RealTalk MS
RealTalk MS
Navigating multiple sclerosis is easier when you understand the science behind it. Join host Jon Strum each week as he translates complex MS research, treatment breakthroughs, and healthcare news into clear, accessible language. Whether you’re living with MS, caring for a loved one, or looking for answers, RealTalk MS connects you with top neuroscientists, advocates, and the information and insights that matter most to your MS journey.
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Aug. 17, 2026

Episode 468: You've Been Given a 15% Chance of Living and Your Spouse Gets Diagnosed with MS with Kathleen Silva

Episode 468: You've Been Given a 15% Chance of Living and Your Spouse Gets Diagnosed with MS with Kathleen Silva
RealTalk MS
Episode 468: You've Been Given a 15% Chance of Living and Your Spouse Gets Diagnosed with MS with Kathleen Silva

Key Takeaways

  • Kathleen Silva shared her harrowing experience of being diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer with a 15% chance of survival shortly before her husband, Rick, was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.
  • Privosector is an investigational intravenous therapy that aims to provide direct neuroprotection during acute MS relapses by shielding delicate nerve axons from permanent destruction.
  • A large survey from the NARCOMs registry revealed that while 40% of MS patients met the clinical criteria for GLP-1 medications like Ozempic, only 7.4% reported using them.
  • A German cohort study demonstrated that cigarette smoking significantly accelerates physical disability and walking impairment in people living with MS, highlighting the importance of quitting.
  • An analysis of U.S. death certificates showed that MS-related mortality rates increased between 2012 and 2023, with cardiovascular comorbidities like hypertension playing a critical role.

Imagine your spouse or significant other has been diagnosed with MS...shortly after you were diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer, and given just a 15% chance of survival. All of a sudden, the roles of patient and care partner are up for grabs -- and they change with almost daily frequency.

Kathleen and Rick Silva

That's exactly the scenario my guest, Kathleen Silva, faced. Kathleen is joining me to discuss how she and her husband, Rick, survived and thrived amid that frightening chaos. (Spoiler alert -- no one died!)

We'll also tell you about an investigational drug that's the first to promise neuroprotection during an MS relapse.

We're sharing study results that show people with MS who meet the medical criteria aren't jumping on the GLP-1 bandwagon.

We'll provide compelling evidence for anyone with MS to quit smoking.

And we're breaking down the results of a study that analyzed mortality rates in cases where MS was listed as the underlying cause of death.

We have a lot to talk about! Are you ready for RealTalk MS??!


This Week: When the roles of patient and care partner get turned upside down and inside out :22

The FDA green lights clinical trials for an investigational drug that promises neuroprotection during an MS relapse 1:08

People living with MS who meet the medical criteria aren't jumping on the GLP-1 bandwagon 5:43

Study results provide startling evidence for quitting smoking if you're living with MS 8:34

In spite of highly effective DMTs, mortality rates for deaths in which MS is listed as the underlying cause are increasing 14:05

Kathleen Silva takes us through the harrowing time in her life when her husband, Rick, was diagnosed with MS shortly after she had been diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer and given just a 15% chance of surviving 19:23

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Next week 36:31


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LINKS

If your podcast app doesn't allow you to click on these links, you'll find them in the show notes at www.RealTalkMS.com

STUDY: Use of Semaglutide and Tirzepatide Among People with Multiple Sclerosis
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/13524585261442033

STUDY: Impact of Tobacco and Alcohol Consumption on Disease Progression and MRI In People With Multiple Sclerosis: Results of the Prospective Cohort Study NationMS
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/17562864261464304

STUDY: Racial and Ethnic Trends and Comorbidity Patterns in Multiple Sclerosis Mortality
https://www.neurology.org/doi/10.1212/WN9.0000000000000148

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https://ectrimspatientcommunity.eu

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RealTalk MS Episode 468
Guest: Kathleen Silva

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the focus of Kathleen Silva's interview on RealTalk MS?

Kathleen discusses how she and her husband, Rick, navigated the frightening chaos of being diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer and multiple sclerosis almost simultaneously.

What is Privosector in the context of MS treatment?

Privosector is an investigational therapy currently moving into clinical trials that is designed to provide direct neuroprotection during an acute MS relapse to prevent permanent axon loss.

How does cigarette smoking impact people with multiple sclerosis?

Research shows that smoking accelerates physical decline and increases the odds of reaching moderate disability and mobility impairment sooner among individuals living with MS.

Why are mortality rates increasing where MS is listed as the underlying cause?

Recent studies suggest that rising mortality rates are heavily influenced by co-occurring health conditions, particularly cardiovascular risk factors like high blood pressure and cardiac events.

WEBVTT

00:00:18.150 --> 00:00:21.350
It's August 18th, and we have a lot to talk about.

00:00:22.090 --> 00:00:26.540
Imagine your spouse or significant other has been diagnosed with MS.

00:00:27.180 --> 00:00:34.840
Shortly after, you were diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and given just a 15% chance of survival.

00:00:35.640 --> 00:00:39.660
All of a sudden, the roles of patient and care partner are up for grabs,

00:00:39.990 --> 00:00:42.510
and they change with almost daily frequency.

00:00:43.220 --> 00:00:47.160
Well, that's exactly the scenario my guest Kathleen Silva faced.

00:00:47.480 --> 00:00:52.080
And Kathleen is joining me to discuss how she and her husband Rick survived

00:00:52.080 --> 00:00:55.730
and even thrived amidst all of that frightening chaos.

00:00:56.250 --> 00:00:58.740
And spoiler alert, no one died.

00:00:59.440 --> 00:01:04.480
But before we meet Kathleen, there are a few other things that you should know about.

00:01:08.700 --> 00:01:13.980
There's a major blind spot in how MS relapses are treated, and the good news

00:01:13.980 --> 00:01:19.010
is there's an experimental therapy that's aiming to change that treatment paradigm.

00:01:19.620 --> 00:01:24.610
If you live with relapsing-remitting MS, then you know the drill when a bad relapse hits.

00:01:25.070 --> 00:01:30.070
Severe symptoms emerge, whether that's sudden vision loss from optic neuritis,

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extreme weakness, or balance issues.

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And the standard medical response is almost always a heavy course of high-dose corticosteroids.

00:01:39.970 --> 00:01:45.910
Now, steroids do an important job. They act like a fire extinguisher for acute inflammation.

00:01:46.450 --> 00:01:50.080
But here's the important detail that often gets left out of the conversation.

00:01:50.710 --> 00:01:56.450
Steroids don't protect nerve fibers from being permanently destroyed during a relapse.

00:01:57.130 --> 00:02:01.370
That's why so many people find that even after a relapse resolves,

00:02:01.770 --> 00:02:08.400
recovery is incomplete, often leaving them with lingering symptoms and worsening disability.

00:02:09.570 --> 00:02:13.660
Privosector is an investigational therapy that's been given the green light

00:02:13.660 --> 00:02:20.700
by the FDA to expand into clinical trials for acute MS relapses with a completely

00:02:20.700 --> 00:02:24.120
different approach, direct neuroprotection.

00:02:25.230 --> 00:02:29.720
To understand why this is a big deal, we need to look at what actually happens

00:02:29.720 --> 00:02:33.730
inside the central nervous system during an acute relapse.

00:02:34.590 --> 00:02:39.120
When the immune system flares up, it doesn't just strip away the protective myelin coating.

00:02:39.560 --> 00:02:45.050
The toxic environment created by that inflammation directly attacks the axons,

00:02:45.470 --> 00:02:49.340
the long, delicate electrical wires that connect your brain cells,

00:02:49.770 --> 00:02:53.560
and once an axon degenerates, that nerve signal is lost.

00:02:54.320 --> 00:02:59.800
Current disease-modifying therapies do an outstanding job of lowering the frequency of relapses.

00:03:00.310 --> 00:03:05.530
Steroids shorten how long the acute inflammation lasts, but neither treatment

00:03:05.530 --> 00:03:08.750
protects that naked axon while it's under attack.

00:03:09.420 --> 00:03:11.320
This is where Privosector comes in.

00:03:12.020 --> 00:03:17.290
Privosector is an intravenous therapy designed not as an immune suppressant,

00:03:17.650 --> 00:03:19.710
but as a neuroprotective shield.

00:03:20.180 --> 00:03:24.800
Instead of targeting the immune system, it works directly at the cellular level

00:03:24.800 --> 00:03:30.690
to help nerve cells and their axons survive the toxic stress of an acute MS relapse.

00:03:31.510 --> 00:03:36.660
Privosector has already been evaluated in phase 2 clinical trials and is currently

00:03:36.660 --> 00:03:41.200
in phase 3 trials as a treatment for acute optic neuritis.

00:03:41.760 --> 00:03:46.150
Now that's inflammation of the optic nerve that causes sudden vision loss,

00:03:46.530 --> 00:03:52.090
which, by the way, is often one of the earliest and clearest symptoms in an MS relapse.

00:03:52.880 --> 00:03:58.330
The proposed regimen for privosector is an intravenous infusion given once daily

00:03:58.330 --> 00:04:03.810
for five days during that acute relapse window, which is similar to the time

00:04:03.810 --> 00:04:05.830
frame used for steroid treatment.

00:04:06.690 --> 00:04:11.260
The primary goal of the clinical trial will be to assess an individual's recovery

00:04:11.600 --> 00:04:14.650
as early as three months after an acute relapse,

00:04:15.090 --> 00:04:20.150
measuring whether preserving axons during the attack leads to better functional

00:04:20.150 --> 00:04:22.670
recovery and less lingering disability.

00:04:23.560 --> 00:04:27.760
Now, privosector isn't meant to replace your disease-modifying therapy.

00:04:28.300 --> 00:04:32.870
It's being developed as an acute intervention to deploy when an attack happens,

00:04:33.250 --> 00:04:39.040
designed to stop permanent nerve loss before it sets in. And that's the paradigm shift.

00:04:39.870 --> 00:04:44.990
The reality of an MS relapse is that the neurodegeneration that occurs persists

00:04:44.990 --> 00:04:47.960
long after the inflammation has settled down.

00:04:48.490 --> 00:04:55.010
And over a period of years, that neurodegeneration is driving the silent accumulation of disability.

00:04:55.680 --> 00:05:00.440
While there are more than 20 DMTs available to reduce the frequency of relapses,

00:05:01.020 --> 00:05:06.390
there are no neuroprotective therapies to preserve nerve tissue when a relapse does occur.

00:05:07.240 --> 00:05:12.520
Privosector is still an investigational drug, and it will need to prove in clinical

00:05:12.520 --> 00:05:17.930
trials that protecting axons during a relapse translates to tangible,

00:05:18.290 --> 00:05:21.130
long-term functional recovery for patients.

00:05:21.680 --> 00:05:27.500
But the shift in research focus from simply calming inflammation to actively

00:05:27.500 --> 00:05:32.310
shielding nerve fibers is exactly where acute MS care needs to go.

00:05:33.280 --> 00:05:34.610
This clinical trial will get

00:05:34.610 --> 00:05:39.180
underway next year, and we'll be watching closely as the data develops.

00:05:43.650 --> 00:05:48.500
You know them by names like Ozempic, Wegovi, Zepbound, and Monjaro.

00:05:48.960 --> 00:05:54.590
These popular GLP receptor agonists appear to be the wonder drugs of the 21st century.

00:05:55.280 --> 00:06:00.060
In addition to managing diabetes and promoting weight loss, researchers are

00:06:00.060 --> 00:06:04.660
finding that these drugs are also effective in reducing the risk of heart attack,

00:06:05.050 --> 00:06:06.730
reducing high blood pressure,

00:06:07.210 --> 00:06:11.950
protecting against chronic kidney disease, improving fatty liver disease,

00:06:12.320 --> 00:06:16.980
reducing addictive behavior, and potentially mitigating cognitive decline.

00:06:17.740 --> 00:06:22.600
Yet most people living with MS who meet the FDA-approved criteria for these

00:06:22.600 --> 00:06:24.550
medications aren't using them.

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Now, as of today, these drugs are approved for managing diabetes and promoting weight loss.

00:06:30.970 --> 00:06:35.890
Yet, the results of a large survey conducted through the NARCOM's registry reveal

00:06:35.890 --> 00:06:40.880
a massive gap between who in the MS community qualifies for these medications

00:06:41.260 --> 00:06:43.030
and who's actually receiving them.

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Researchers analyzed data from 4,181 survey participants to see how many met

00:06:50.700 --> 00:06:56.580
the clinical criteria for GLP-1 therapy and how many had ever taken these drugs.

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And they found that a full 40% of the survey respondents met FDA-approved indications

00:07:03.580 --> 00:07:09.420
for GLP-1 drugs like Ozempic and Manjaro, primarily based on their body mass

00:07:09.420 --> 00:07:11.810
index and other related health conditions.

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Yet, only 7.4% of the survey participants reported ever actually using one of these medications.

00:07:20.690 --> 00:07:25.180
That means the vast majority of people with MS who meet standard medical criteria

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for a GLP-1 prescription are not on these treatments.

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And that should be concerning for our community.

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First, metabolic health and other vascular health conditions are known to influence

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long-term MS disease course and individual mobility.

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When conditions that qualify someone for GLP-1 therapy go unaddressed,

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it puts extra strain on their overall neurological health.

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Second, it highlights ongoing real-world barriers that might include insurance

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hurdles, coverage denials, out-of-pocket costs, and discussions that simply

00:08:03.370 --> 00:08:06.530
aren't happening during routine neurology appointments.

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So this is where you get to be your own healthcare advocate.

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It. If you have questions about whether managing your metabolic health or exploring

00:08:16.180 --> 00:08:22.080
GLP-1 therapies fits into your broader care plan, you're the one that needs

00:08:22.080 --> 00:08:23.740
to bring it up with your health care team.

00:08:24.560 --> 00:08:30.050
Now, if you'd like to review the details of this study, you'll find that link in today's show notes.

00:08:34.780 --> 00:08:38.940
While disease-modifying therapies do the heavy lifting and managing multiple

00:08:38.940 --> 00:08:43.150
sclerosis, the everyday choices we make are lifestyle habits.

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Well, they can play a measurable role in how the disease unfolds.

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That's why, especially when it comes to the unpredictable nature of MS,

00:08:52.310 --> 00:08:56.950
I think it's important for us to talk about the power of knowing what you can control.

00:08:57.910 --> 00:09:04.760
In a study from Germany, researchers followed 1,374 adults diagnosed with either

00:09:04.760 --> 00:09:08.530
clinically isolated syndrome or relapsing-remitting MS

00:09:08.950 --> 00:09:12.980
for up to six years across 22 study centers in Germany.

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Now, none of these participants had started any MS treatment when they enrolled

00:09:17.880 --> 00:09:22.860
in the study, which provided the researchers a clean baseline to track how two

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specific habits, cigarette smoking and alcohol consumption,

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impact physical disability, walking speed, cognitive sharpness,

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and MRI lesion activity over time.

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So let's break down what the numbers showed and what they mean in practical terms.

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When it came to smoking tobacco, about 32% of the participants reported smoking

00:09:46.570 --> 00:09:47.690
at the start of the study.

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The researchers tracked whether the smokers were more likely to reach key disability

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thresholds during the six-year follow-up,

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and they found that smokers across all categories, that is light smokers,

00:10:01.310 --> 00:10:04.090
moderate smokers, and heavy smokers,

00:10:04.670 --> 00:10:09.410
they all showed increased odds of reaching an EDSS score of 3,

00:10:09.860 --> 00:10:12.960
which marks the shift into moderate disability.

00:10:13.770 --> 00:10:20.260
For light smokers, that risk was significantly higher, with an 80% increase

00:10:20.260 --> 00:10:22.780
in the odds compared to non-smokers.

00:10:23.310 --> 00:10:28.650
So if you smoke if you're a light smoker, please take a minute to let that sink in.

00:10:30.010 --> 00:10:33.880
When it came to walking speed, the study used a six-second threshold on the

00:10:33.880 --> 00:10:39.160
timed 25-foot walk test as a benchmark for meaningful mobility decline.

00:10:39.920 --> 00:10:45.790
Light smokers faced an 85% increase in the odds of hitting that slower walking

00:10:45.790 --> 00:10:48.270
threshold compared to non-smokers.

00:10:48.960 --> 00:10:53.360
And when they analyzed differences in cognitive function, changes in processing

00:10:53.360 --> 00:10:57.140
speed and memory were less consistent across the participant groups.

00:10:57.720 --> 00:11:00.520
They showed no clear statistical pattern.

00:11:01.230 --> 00:11:04.330
But there was a critical nuance in the MRI data.

00:11:05.030 --> 00:11:10.630
Smoking did not significantly correlate with higher numbers of new T2 lesions

00:11:10.880 --> 00:11:13.700
or active gadolinium-enhancing lesions.

00:11:14.490 --> 00:11:20.120
This suggests that smoking's harmful impact in MS may be driven by ongoing direct

00:11:20.120 --> 00:11:24.810
neurodegeneration and nerve damage rather than acute visible inflammation. information.

00:11:25.770 --> 00:11:31.540
Now, the study also evaluated alcohol use, categorizing about 27% of the study

00:11:31.540 --> 00:11:39.600
participants as non-drinkers, 68% as occasional drinkers, and about 4% as regular drinkers.

00:11:40.120 --> 00:11:44.970
And at first glance, the statistics showed that occasional drinkers had lower

00:11:44.970 --> 00:11:49.480
odds of reaching the disability cutoffs for EDSS, walking speed,

00:11:49.660 --> 00:11:52.540
and cognitive decline compared to non-drinkers.

00:11:53.190 --> 00:11:58.700
But before you take that as a reason to start drinking, the researchers explicitly

00:11:58.700 --> 00:12:04.780
emphasized a very important concept in epidemiology called reverse causation.

00:12:05.560 --> 00:12:09.280
That means alcohol isn't necessarily protecting the brain.

00:12:09.750 --> 00:12:15.030
Instead, people who feel physically better and have milder symptoms are probably

00:12:15.030 --> 00:12:17.740
more likely to participate in social drinking.

00:12:18.250 --> 00:12:23.600
Meanwhile, people experiencing greater disability, fatigue, or medication side

00:12:23.600 --> 00:12:26.980
effects, well, they often cut back or stop drinking altogether.

00:12:27.500 --> 00:12:32.710
But the authors were very clear. This data does not support using alcohol as

00:12:32.710 --> 00:12:38.090
an anti-inflammatory strategy, and any potential association has to be weighed

00:12:38.090 --> 00:12:40.610
against the known health risks of alcohol.

00:12:41.390 --> 00:12:49.110
So what are the clear takeaways from following these 1,374 study participants for over six years.

00:12:49.820 --> 00:12:54.650
First, smoking accelerates physical decline among people living with MS.

00:12:55.370 --> 00:13:01.210
Smoking is directly linked to reaching moderate physical disability and walking impairment sooner.

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If you smoke, quitting is one of the single most impactful, proactive steps

00:13:07.400 --> 00:13:09.630
you can take to protect your mobility.

00:13:10.770 --> 00:13:13.980
Second, lesions don't tell the whole story.

00:13:14.840 --> 00:13:19.930
The lack of new MRI lesions among smokers reminds us that silent nerve damage

00:13:19.930 --> 00:13:24.960
can happen under the surface even when standard inflammation markers look stable,

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a condition now known as progression independent of relapse activity, or PIRA.

00:13:31.450 --> 00:13:34.910
And finally, don't misinterpret the alcohol findings.

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The apparent protective trend with alcohol is most likely a reflection of who

00:13:40.190 --> 00:13:43.750
feels well enough to drink. It's not a medical benefit.

00:13:44.790 --> 00:13:48.390
If you're looking for resources or support to help you quit smoking,

00:13:48.630 --> 00:13:51.620
talk directly with your neurologist or primary care team.

00:13:52.010 --> 00:13:55.260
There are evidence-based programs that are designed to help you.

00:13:55.800 --> 00:13:58.800
And if you'd like to review the details of this study, well,

00:13:58.800 --> 00:14:01.080
you'll find that link in today's show notes.

00:14:05.630 --> 00:14:09.810
Over the last couple of decades, the explosion of disease-modifying therapies

00:14:09.810 --> 00:14:13.470
has fundamentally transformed what it means to manage MS.

00:14:14.170 --> 00:14:18.910
But managing MS effectively means looking beyond relapse rates and brain lesions

00:14:19.080 --> 00:14:23.380
to address the whole person, including those underlying health conditions that

00:14:23.380 --> 00:14:26.660
directly impact an individual's long-term survival.

00:14:27.440 --> 00:14:32.870
A major new study published in the journal Neurology analyzed more than 42,000

00:14:32.870 --> 00:14:39.960
U.S. death certificates from 2012 to 2023, where multiple sclerosis was listed

00:14:39.960 --> 00:14:41.670
as the underlying cause of death.

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So let's take a moment to clarify what that means.

00:14:45.800 --> 00:14:50.380
Just like HIV or AIDS, no one dies from MS.

00:14:50.710 --> 00:14:56.430
However, people do pass away from other health conditions due to having MS,

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and in those cases, MS is considered the underlying cause of death.

00:15:02.620 --> 00:15:06.550
Led by Dr. Liliana Amesqua from the Keck School of Medicine of USC,

00:15:07.150 --> 00:15:10.970
alongside collaborators from the University of Kentucky and the University of

00:15:10.970 --> 00:15:16.270
Virginia, this research provides a sober, necessary look at mortality trends,

00:15:16.600 --> 00:15:21.880
racial disparities, and the growing importance of cardiovascular health in MS.

00:15:22.970 --> 00:15:30.020
Analyzing 42,205 records from a CDC database, the research team found that even

00:15:30.020 --> 00:15:35.640
when adjusting for age groups, MS-related death rates increased over the 12-year

00:15:35.640 --> 00:15:37.090
period that was analyzed.

00:15:37.460 --> 00:15:42.360
And as Dr. Amesco has noted, while we might expect treatment advances to flatten

00:15:42.360 --> 00:15:47.680
these trends, the persistence of rising death rates shows there's still critical work to do,

00:15:48.160 --> 00:15:52.620
especially around co-occurring illnesses called comorbidities.

00:15:53.720 --> 00:15:58.230
This analysis also showed black individuals had the highest MS-related death

00:15:58.230 --> 00:16:00.450
rates, followed by white individuals.

00:16:01.210 --> 00:16:08.040
Black patients with MS died younger, with mortality rates peaking between the ages of 65 and 74.

00:16:08.670 --> 00:16:14.800
For white patients, death rates peaked a decade later, between the ages of 75 and 84.

00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:22.370
And in the Hispanic MS population, death rates rose among female patients between the ages of 45 and 84.

00:16:23.310 --> 00:16:28.190
The highest mortality rates were concentrated in northern and midwestern states,

00:16:28.630 --> 00:16:34.070
including Wyoming, Oregon, Utah, Nebraska, Kansas, Minnesota,

00:16:34.070 --> 00:16:39.300
Michigan, New Hampshire, and Maine, pointing to potential differences in demographics,

00:16:39.530 --> 00:16:42.940
healthcare access, and regional prevalence of MS.

00:16:43.820 --> 00:16:48.540
Perhaps the most actionable finding in this entire paper is the role of co-occurring

00:16:48.540 --> 00:16:51.910
conditions, particularly cardiovascular health.

00:16:52.520 --> 00:16:59.210
MS-related deaths involving hypertension increased between 2019 and 2023 among

00:16:59.210 --> 00:17:07.080
both white and black patients, and deaths involving cardiac arrest also rose between 2019 and 2022,

00:17:07.500 --> 00:17:09.800
impacting black patients most heavily.

00:17:10.600 --> 00:17:14.050
High blood pressure and vascular disease don't just damage the heart.

00:17:14.630 --> 00:17:19.650
They cause microvascular brain changes that can accelerate neurodegeneration.

00:17:20.340 --> 00:17:25.250
Further complicating things, cardiovascular damage can mimic MS lesions on an

00:17:25.250 --> 00:17:28.940
MRI scan, contributing to diagnostic delays,

00:17:29.600 --> 00:17:34.350
especially when previous research shows patients from racial and ethnic minority

00:17:34.350 --> 00:17:39.630
groups can already wait up to a decade longer for an accurate MS diagnosis.

00:17:40.590 --> 00:17:45.840
The major takeaway from this research is that MS care can't exist in a silo.

00:17:46.670 --> 00:17:52.670
High blood pressure, cholesterol, and cardiac risk factors are treatable and often preventable.

00:17:53.320 --> 00:17:58.270
And managing your cardiovascular health with your primary care provider is just

00:17:58.270 --> 00:18:03.200
as vital to protecting your brain and extending your life as choosing the right

00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:05.950
disease-modifying therapy with your neurologist.

00:18:06.570 --> 00:18:09.880
Now, it's worth noting that because it relied on death certificates,

00:18:09.880 --> 00:18:14.190
researchers couldn't track specific MS treatments, disease severity,

00:18:14.560 --> 00:18:16.260
or healthcare access directly.

00:18:17.020 --> 00:18:22.080
And COVID-19 likely influenced the mortality rates in the later years of the study.

00:18:22.750 --> 00:18:29.130
But the broad takeaway remains clear. Neurological health really means whole body health.

00:18:29.840 --> 00:18:34.880
Now, if you'd like to review the details of this study, you'll find that link in today's show notes.

00:18:35.580 --> 00:18:38.410
And while we're on the uncomfortable subject of life and death,

00:18:38.990 --> 00:18:40.900
consider this scenario for a moment.

00:18:41.620 --> 00:18:47.710
You've been diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and given a 15% chance of survival.

00:18:48.490 --> 00:18:51.280
While you and your spouse are trying to wrap your heads around that,

00:18:51.640 --> 00:18:53.770
your spouse is diagnosed with MS.

00:18:54.180 --> 00:18:59.700
And because your spouse is a male, it's likely that his disease trajectory could be difficult.

00:19:00.340 --> 00:19:03.840
That's the situation Kathleen and Rick Silva found themselves in.

00:19:04.510 --> 00:19:08.930
And in a moment, my guest Kathleen Silva will walk us through what that time

00:19:08.930 --> 00:19:13.640
was like, how she and Rick each took on the roles of patient and care partners

00:19:13.640 --> 00:19:18.180
simultaneously, and what it was that kept them both emotionally afloat.

00:19:22.990 --> 00:19:28.290
Imagine your significant other or spouse has been diagnosed with MS shortly

00:19:28.290 --> 00:19:31.760
after you've been diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer.

00:19:32.430 --> 00:19:36.600
All of a sudden, your role as a care partner just got very complicated.

00:19:37.360 --> 00:19:42.770
That's exactly the scenario my guest Kathleen Silva faced. Welcome to the podcast, Kathleen.

00:19:43.490 --> 00:19:46.470
Well, thank you, Jon. I'm excited to be here.

00:19:46.910 --> 00:19:52.310
Your husband, Rick, was the spouse in question here who was diagnosed with MS,

00:19:52.640 --> 00:19:58.040
And when you and Rick received these diagnoses so close together,

00:19:58.540 --> 00:20:00.940
the traditional roles of patient

00:20:00.940 --> 00:20:05.310
and caregiver, well, they were completely rewritten for both of you.

00:20:05.890 --> 00:20:11.220
In those early days, how did you even begin to parse out who needed what and when?

00:20:12.140 --> 00:20:16.460
Well, that was not real hard because Rick's at that point was more emotional,

00:20:17.120 --> 00:20:24.800
emotionally devastating. Mine was physically devastating. So initially, I took the care.

00:20:25.220 --> 00:20:29.340
And it could have been a blessing for Rick because it took him out of and it

00:20:29.340 --> 00:20:32.710
stopped him from getting depressed. It stopped him from worrying about himself

00:20:32.710 --> 00:20:38.970
because he was worried so much for me because I was only given a 15% chance of living.

00:20:39.330 --> 00:20:48.620
And so he just focused right in on me and kind of put his problems a little bit aside.

00:20:49.070 --> 00:20:54.000
Stage 4 colon cancer treatment is incredibly demanding on its own.

00:20:54.490 --> 00:20:59.080
How did you balance the physical toll of your own treatments with the emotional

00:20:59.080 --> 00:21:02.300
energy required to support Rick through his diagnosis?

00:21:02.820 --> 00:21:08.730
He, to his credit, kept it very in the back.

00:21:09.050 --> 00:21:10.820
He focused it all on me.

00:21:11.320 --> 00:21:17.810
And he went to every single appointment, every single chemo treatment, every single thing.

00:21:19.380 --> 00:21:25.370
I popped off after I still had my PICC line in.

00:21:25.680 --> 00:21:30.120
I had a colostomy bag. And I knew I was dying. So I said, we have to go camping.

00:21:30.800 --> 00:21:35.520
And so having some MS problems.

00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:39.850
And I called my daughter. she was coming in from Hawaii, and I said,

00:21:39.850 --> 00:21:42.260
Courtney, when you come, we've got to go camping.

00:21:42.500 --> 00:21:45.670
I want to go camping one more time before I die. So Rick said,

00:21:46.750 --> 00:21:52.150
sucked it up. We went camping in a tent that was supposed to be a big tent,

00:21:52.290 --> 00:21:53.700
but it ended up being a pup tent.

00:21:54.030 --> 00:21:58.240
And Rick slept outside in the car to make my dream come true.

00:21:58.710 --> 00:22:03.160
And it was my daughter had just found out she was pregnant.

00:22:03.530 --> 00:22:10.470
I was convinced, well, not convinced, but I was very aware of what my problems were.

00:22:10.800 --> 00:22:16.990
And then Rick having MS and my daughter's mother-in-law and all in this little tent.

00:22:17.350 --> 00:22:24.210
And it's kind of like, you know, he just gave it all up for that so I could live and be happy.

00:22:25.180 --> 00:22:27.540
So he's an amazing man. Amazing.

00:22:28.340 --> 00:22:32.820
All the demands of caregiving, what I'll call the clinical side,

00:22:33.720 --> 00:22:37.710
those are one thing. But there's also a whole administrative burden too.

00:22:37.710 --> 00:22:42.850
There are appointments, there's insurance, there's medications and prescriptions.

00:22:43.450 --> 00:22:48.780
How did the two of you manage the logistics of navigating two complex chronic

00:22:48.780 --> 00:22:51.280
illnesses virtually at the same time?

00:22:52.480 --> 00:22:57.560
That's the one thing I thought, wow, when you get cancer, it's a time commitment.

00:22:58.610 --> 00:23:01.970
Every day, you're either going to get blood drawn, you're going to go to the

00:23:01.970 --> 00:23:05.020
chemo, you're going to, every single day, every single day, there's something.

00:23:05.670 --> 00:23:12.470
And Rick at that point was still driving And he was still good And he just did

00:23:12.470 --> 00:23:19.880
it And he didn't have any His physical demands weren't as strong as they are now

00:23:20.770 --> 00:23:23.700
And I think he just held it together because I needed it.

00:23:24.220 --> 00:23:28.420
And you just do it every day. You just do a little step, step by step.

00:23:28.420 --> 00:23:30.040
You take baby steps every day.

00:23:30.460 --> 00:23:35.810
And my doctor one time said, because I wanted to know, oh, you know about this

00:23:35.810 --> 00:23:40.370
and that. And which medication should I be taking? What should I be eating differently?

00:23:40.700 --> 00:23:44.080
And Rick's going, can I look anything up on the internet? Can I do whatever

00:23:44.080 --> 00:23:46.330
it takes to get Kathleen well?

00:23:46.700 --> 00:23:50.480
And the doctor looked at me and he said, Kathleen, slow down.

00:23:50.800 --> 00:23:56.400
He said, you need to take things one day at a time. Don't look at tomorrow and

00:23:56.400 --> 00:23:58.430
just take it step by step.

00:23:58.690 --> 00:24:02.320
And he told Rick, don't look at what's happening to Kathleen on the computer.

00:24:03.280 --> 00:24:08.160
And I think because he wanted us to have total trust in my care team.

00:24:08.740 --> 00:24:15.560
And that's transferred over to Rick and his care team because you hear so much

00:24:15.560 --> 00:24:19.310
about so many different things. You know, is it diet? Should you change your

00:24:19.310 --> 00:24:19.830
diet? Should you do this?

00:24:20.270 --> 00:24:23.300
There's supplements out there that you should take this you should take that

00:24:23.300 --> 00:24:24.970
you know this works this doesn't work

00:24:25.570 --> 00:24:31.740
and because of having to focus first on me taking a wet step at a time and having

00:24:31.740 --> 00:24:38.000
total faith in my physicians and my care team we've now been able to go oh okay that works

00:24:38.560 --> 00:24:43.340
and so for Rick it was we have total faith in our doctor we've he's always been blessed

00:24:43.950 --> 00:24:48.480
well his first care team didn't get it right but you just keep going till you find the right

00:24:49.340 --> 00:24:53.600
one then you put your trust in them and you do it one by one and it it takes

00:24:53.600 --> 00:24:56.770
it was a journey to find the right ones the right care team

00:24:57.400 --> 00:25:03.930
Ms and cancer are both unpredictable but in very different ways did that shared

00:25:03.930 --> 00:25:09.230
yet entirely different experience of facing a serious illness change the way

00:25:09.230 --> 00:25:11.640
you and rick communicated with each other.

00:25:12.380 --> 00:25:16.790
Yes and no, because we've always been, I married my best friend when right out

00:25:16.790 --> 00:25:20.050
of high school, I was the cheerleader who was a football player.

00:25:20.550 --> 00:25:25.940
And we've raised such a good family. And we've always been so communicative

00:25:25.940 --> 00:25:30.320
between the two of us, that it was just like a natural morphing into,

00:25:30.650 --> 00:25:32.000
you know, you need it first.

00:25:32.940 --> 00:25:38.780
I've got your back. Now I've got your back. And just the constant giving and

00:25:38.780 --> 00:25:43.580
taking for each other. It's just a daily struggle.

00:25:44.170 --> 00:25:48.490
Well, this may be the perfect follow-on to what you just said.

00:25:48.490 --> 00:25:53.930
I'm curious, and you know, in a caregiving relationship, it's easy for the illness

00:25:53.930 --> 00:25:56.140
to become a third partner in the marriage.

00:25:57.210 --> 00:26:02.190
How did you two protect your identity as husband and wife separate from being

00:26:02.190 --> 00:26:04.100
patients and caregivers?

00:26:05.080 --> 00:26:11.080
Well, when we moved to Tennessee from California, and I took a job,

00:26:11.080 --> 00:26:13.980
a part-time job, at our local museum.

00:26:14.090 --> 00:26:17.350
And it is such a fun job. I work with kids all the time.

00:26:17.750 --> 00:26:22.950
I'm the associate education department, and I work with kids.

00:26:23.250 --> 00:26:27.200
And so it's just fun. And so me, I always have something going and I'm hustling

00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:28.280
all the time and it's fun.

00:26:28.610 --> 00:26:34.670
Rick has, he has a Peloton. He rides every single day faithfully.

00:26:35.070 --> 00:26:39.200
He exercises every single day faithfully. It takes what it would normally take

00:26:39.200 --> 00:26:42.950
the normal person 10 minutes to do because Rick has to keep stopping.

00:26:43.310 --> 00:26:47.780
It takes him an hour to do his exercises and he does them every single day.

00:26:48.280 --> 00:26:51.860
And the reason why he says, because he lost 70 pounds.

00:26:52.240 --> 00:26:54.430
And he said, because if you ever have to pick me up the floor,

00:26:54.430 --> 00:26:57.070
Kathleen, I don't want you breaking your back.

00:26:58.500 --> 00:27:02.970
So he's wrapped up in that. And we do have the most adorable little Yorkie dog

00:27:02.970 --> 00:27:07.730
that, you know, she's just everybody's best friend. And that kind of separates,

00:27:08.110 --> 00:27:09.720
you know, and Rick has a garden.

00:27:10.000 --> 00:27:12.180
He goes outside every day and he gardens.

00:27:12.560 --> 00:27:17.720
And he can't do the yard work anymore. But we put in raised bed planters so

00:27:17.720 --> 00:27:19.370
that he can actually garden.

00:27:19.950 --> 00:27:23.850
We both read, enjoy reading. and Rick, his comprehension is shot.

00:27:24.070 --> 00:27:27.350
So he'll have to read the same paragraph about 15 times.

00:27:27.720 --> 00:27:30.890
And then even then, it's like every time he picks up the book,

00:27:30.890 --> 00:27:32.500
he's got to remember where he was.

00:27:33.260 --> 00:27:39.570
So we have kept up separate lives, but we're still married. And we,

00:27:39.890 --> 00:27:42.880
you know, and I talk to the kids and he'll talk to the kids and we don't have

00:27:42.880 --> 00:27:44.190
to do everything together.

00:27:45.460 --> 00:27:51.480
And the other thing that Rick can do is, I used to do all the housework,

00:27:51.480 --> 00:27:53.010
all the cooking, everything.

00:27:53.300 --> 00:27:59.430
And since I've got this job, it's forced Rick to go ahead and he'll do some dusting.

00:28:00.100 --> 00:28:03.450
We've pared down our household so everything is easier to do.

00:28:04.030 --> 00:28:08.710
And he actually cooks. But for me, I'll get in the kitchen, I'll have dinner

00:28:08.710 --> 00:28:10.070
on the table, you know, wham, wham.

00:28:10.360 --> 00:28:13.610
And for Rick, he's got to start at 10 in the morning, take a break,

00:28:14.130 --> 00:28:19.300
do it again. And we've had to, and so, but he's found that he really enjoys

00:28:19.300 --> 00:28:21.940
doing it if he feels good that day.

00:28:22.660 --> 00:28:27.510
Well, speaking about feeling good on any particular day, I want you to think

00:28:27.510 --> 00:28:30.590
back to when your treatment was front and center.

00:28:31.180 --> 00:28:35.150
Do you remember whether there was a specific moment or you had a realization

00:28:35.580 --> 00:28:41.770
where you had to explicitly say, hey, I need to step back as a caregiver today,

00:28:42.360 --> 00:28:45.530
because my body is telling me I need to be the patient?

00:28:46.810 --> 00:28:50.250
I never have those days, but Rick does. And when he does, it's fine.

00:28:50.510 --> 00:28:56.550
I just, not a problem, Rick. You know, if you don't feel like cooking and dinner's

00:28:56.550 --> 00:29:01.200
not on the table when I come home, I'll do it. Not a big deal. Nothing is a big deal.

00:29:01.330 --> 00:29:05.500
Nothing is too big of a deal for either one of us to do for the other.

00:29:05.820 --> 00:29:09.220
And I just think that's because that's the way we've always been.

00:29:10.340 --> 00:29:17.270
You know, I think a lot of people know how to show up when one sick person is in a household,

00:29:17.760 --> 00:29:24.010
but when both partners are facing separate health crises, friends and family

00:29:24.010 --> 00:29:25.980
can sometimes just get paralyzed.

00:29:25.980 --> 00:29:29.200
They don't know exactly how to help or what to do.

00:29:29.860 --> 00:29:32.250
What did effective support look like for you?

00:29:33.120 --> 00:29:36.680
Well, you got to ask for it, right? Because if you don't, you won't get it.

00:29:37.500 --> 00:29:40.010
And you can't rely on other people being able to read your mind,

00:29:40.980 --> 00:29:43.230
either for Rick or me or our kids.

00:29:43.600 --> 00:29:49.540
But our kids have been so phenomenally amazing. They just, I don't know,

00:29:50.160 --> 00:29:52.950
I guess it's something because we've always lived that way, our family.

00:29:52.950 --> 00:29:57.830
It's because our families, our parents, both of our parents were married for,

00:29:58.410 --> 00:30:00.180
you know, 50 some odd years.

00:30:00.180 --> 00:30:05.110
So we, my parents, well, Rick's parents, not so much because his dad died.

00:30:05.110 --> 00:30:10.100
But on my side of the family, my parents were married for 52 years.

00:30:10.100 --> 00:30:12.420
My grandparents were married for 57 years.

00:30:12.790 --> 00:30:19.620
It's like you see every day what it takes to be there for each other. And...

00:30:21.330 --> 00:30:24.620
We've all come from a very strong church background.

00:30:25.180 --> 00:30:33.670
And I think that when you ask for help and you give people the opportunity to help you,

00:30:34.360 --> 00:30:39.380
that they're blessing you the same time you're blessing them because they learned

00:30:39.380 --> 00:30:41.070
how to take care of someone too.

00:30:41.590 --> 00:30:48.020
And our kids, I figure because our kids watched me take care of my parents.

00:30:48.970 --> 00:30:57.530
Now my kids know how to take care of us and that you talk about it you laugh about it we've just been

00:30:59.470 --> 00:31:04.480
Blessed that way, and I hate to say it was lucky, because there's nothing in this that's lucky.

00:31:05.410 --> 00:31:12.380
You just do what it takes, and that's how we just help each other.

00:31:13.390 --> 00:31:18.970
When it comes to the people around you who absolutely want to help,

00:31:19.730 --> 00:31:23.830
is there anything you found that others should probably avoid doing?

00:31:25.380 --> 00:31:31.880
I have learned that I let Rick do his own, do what he can do.

00:31:33.250 --> 00:31:38.010
And he knows when he, he's very honest and he'll say, I don't need your help doing that.

00:31:38.390 --> 00:31:42.310
Or Kathleen, I can't button my buttons up. Could you please button my buttons?

00:31:42.900 --> 00:31:49.180
And for someone that doesn't know us, just, you know, a phone call,

00:31:50.020 --> 00:31:52.990
just checking in. You don't even have to mention being said,

00:31:52.990 --> 00:31:56.800
you know, how are you feeling or anything. Just call. Just how you doing?

00:31:57.510 --> 00:32:00.650
And I guess that's just it.

00:32:01.570 --> 00:32:06.220
Just be honest with people and hope they be honest back and show that you care

00:32:06.220 --> 00:32:10.240
through, you know, do you need—I'm going to the grocery store.

00:32:10.240 --> 00:32:12.750
Do you need anything? Our neighbors are super good.

00:32:13.920 --> 00:32:19.170
They mow our lawn every once in a while, and they just—and it's because we're

00:32:19.170 --> 00:32:24.460
nice to them. We're good to them. And they, I don't know, I've never had to

00:32:24.460 --> 00:32:26.480
actually face that problem.

00:32:27.840 --> 00:32:28.820
And that's a good thing.

00:32:29.690 --> 00:32:35.150
Oh, I know. And so many people have lives so much more difficult.

00:32:35.150 --> 00:32:39.730
It's hard to even say I have a difficult life when you see what other people have to face.

00:32:41.460 --> 00:32:46.360
For a care partner listening to our conversation who feels like they're drowning

00:32:46.360 --> 00:32:50.570
under the weight of their own health challenges alongside their partners,

00:32:51.110 --> 00:32:55.400
what's something you wish someone had told you at the very beginning of this journey?

00:32:56.440 --> 00:33:01.560
There's an end. It might not always be the end you want, but there is an end.

00:33:02.120 --> 00:33:07.020
And just enjoy the time that you have to the capacity that you have.

00:33:07.460 --> 00:33:11.970
I mean, because I know that there are times when Rick has been so depressed

00:33:12.510 --> 00:33:16.410
and he had the trigeminal neuralgia going on where he cried for a year and a

00:33:16.410 --> 00:33:18.720
half all day long, every day.

00:33:19.320 --> 00:33:25.210
And there are times where you just, you try a medication and it's not working

00:33:25.210 --> 00:33:28.260
and you just have to trust your doctors.

00:33:28.630 --> 00:33:31.710
And then, but be an informed truster.

00:33:31.710 --> 00:33:35.610
We went to all those MS meetings, and we learned about all these kinds

00:33:37.070 --> 00:33:47.460
Of treatments and therapies, and you were able to talk back and forth with these experts in person, and

00:33:48.900 --> 00:33:55.320
It is very difficult. I don't want to, sometimes because I do, I am a positive person.

00:33:56.020 --> 00:34:01.300
It's kind of hard for me to encourage, well, it's not hard for me to encourage

00:34:01.300 --> 00:34:04.960
other people, but I don't want them to think, oh, you're such a Pollyanna.

00:34:05.110 --> 00:34:09.180
You're not living in the world because Rick, thanks be to God.

00:34:09.180 --> 00:34:16.570
And thank you to all the medical professionals and who have constantly working

00:34:16.570 --> 00:34:19.620
on things to make people with MS their lives better.

00:34:20.070 --> 00:34:26.100
And because of them, Rick is, they've arrested his MS to the point where he

00:34:26.100 --> 00:34:29.870
walks, but he stumbles all over everywhere. One time we were at a,

00:34:30.170 --> 00:34:32.850
my daughter's graduation, she was getting her master's degree.

00:34:33.340 --> 00:34:37.650
And we, Rick was in a suit and I was in a nice dress and the lawn,

00:34:37.650 --> 00:34:41.160
we were walking across this lawn and it was a little lumpy. It was 10 o'clock in the morning.

00:34:41.730 --> 00:34:45.550
And I overheard Rick, you know, here's Rick trying his hardest.

00:34:46.010 --> 00:34:49.630
And this lady, she goes, isn't that disgusting it's 10 o'clock in the morning

00:34:49.630 --> 00:34:53.570
and he's already drunk it was like what

00:34:56.150 --> 00:35:00.600
And um you know it's just you have you have these daily

00:35:01.250 --> 00:35:06.680
things to worry about but thank goodness rick was his medication was able he

00:35:06.680 --> 00:35:11.370
still panics if there's anything in the floor it's like rick just walk around it.

00:35:12.150 --> 00:35:14.630
But I might step on it, but you might not.

00:35:15.610 --> 00:35:19.770
And he, you know, wakes up several times a night and you just know that he's

00:35:19.770 --> 00:35:27.150
in pain and it, you just hold each other's hands. And I don't know. I don't know.

00:35:27.940 --> 00:35:32.120
Cause every, that's the other crazy thing about MS. Everybody's journey is different.

00:35:32.590 --> 00:35:36.710
Everybody's journey is different. There's nothing. That's why it's so hard to

00:35:36.710 --> 00:35:41.900
diagnose. And it's so hard to be a cheerleader sometimes because you didn't

00:35:41.900 --> 00:35:44.970
know how much, how cheery you should be.

00:35:46.480 --> 00:35:52.110
All excellent points. And clearly coming from a place where you've lived them, they're not theory.

00:35:52.770 --> 00:35:55.870
Kathleen Silva, I want to thank you for sharing your story. I think hearing

00:35:55.870 --> 00:35:57.490
it is going to help a lot of people.

00:35:58.040 --> 00:36:01.340
And thanks so much for, yeah, and thanks so much for talking with me today.

00:36:01.990 --> 00:36:05.020
Yeah, and if anybody ever needs help, if he's a cheerleader, I'm here.

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That's going to wrap up this episode of Real Talk MS. Real Talk MS is powered

00:36:10.150 --> 00:36:11.860
by the National MS Society.

00:36:12.280 --> 00:36:16.240
And you can share this episode of the podcast by letting your friends or family

00:36:16.240 --> 00:36:23.700
members know that all they have to do is point their web browser at realtalkms.com slash 468.

00:36:24.340 --> 00:36:28.390
You'll find that link in today's show notes, so you can easily copy and paste

00:36:28.390 --> 00:36:30.890
it right into an email or a text.

00:36:31.700 --> 00:36:36.800
I've always believed that the invisible symptoms of MS are far scarier than the physical symptoms.

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And of all the invisible symptoms, issues related to cognitive function can

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be particularly frightening.

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I remember my reaction when I first noticed my wife showing signs of cognitive decline.

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Now, she was already living with significant physical disabilities,

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but in spite of those changes, she was still the same person.

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When she started experiencing cognitive issues, it felt to me like that person

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I had always known was slowly disappearing.

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And that's a scary feeling.

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Today, there are steps you can take and even lifestyle choices you can make

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that can help manage MS-related cognitive issues.

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Next week, Dr. Anna Kratz joins

00:37:16.040 --> 00:37:19.570
me to discuss managing cognitive function when you're living with MS.

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I hope you'll join me for this important conversation.

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I'm Jon Strum. Thanks for listening. Stay safe and make healthy choices.